If I asked you to tell me three things you're genuinely proud of, how quickly could you answer?Most people squirm. Some nervously laugh. Many deflect. (I’ve met a lot that do all 3!) A few answer me but then quickly feel the need to crap all over it by pointing out things they’ve done wrong. You know who you are! And then there is the other group. The people who don't need me to ask because they spend the first twenty minutes of every coaching session conducting what feels suspiciously like an interview for their own autobiography. Neither response is wrong. Both responses fascinate me. A few years ago, I asked a client to name 3 things she celebrated about herself. She paused, thought, the tumbleweeds blew through the town, she eventually answered in a tone that suggested she was admitting a dark secret never before shared. This was not a comfortable question! For high performing professionals, it's remarkable how difficult that question can be. Many can list ten things they should have done better before they can identify one thing they did incredibly well. They remember the awkward comment in a meeting six months ago. The email they sent with a typo. The client they didn't win. The opportunity they think they should have pursued. But ask what they're proud of and their emotions will highjack the whole conversation. Others have the opposite problem. Every achievement is evidence of exceptional talent. Every setback is someone else's fault. Feedback becomes optional because they've already decided they're doing brilliantly. Somewhere between self-criticism and self-congratulation sits something far more useful. Clarity. Awareness. Openness. Acceptance. Being able to recognise what you've done well without turning it into arrogance. Being able to acknowledge mistakes without turning them into evidence that you're failing. Acceptance that perfection is a myth and we are all doing the best we can with what we have. So I'll leave you with the same question. What are three things you're genuinely proud of? And if that question makes you uncomfortable, perhaps that's worth being curious about. You’re doing great! Michelle
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